Shodai’s Blog September 8 2009 11:08 am Playas de Tijuana, Baja California, México

Shodai’s Blog September 8 2009 11:08 am Playas de Tijuana, Baja California, México

Shiken haramitsu daikomyo!

I am still dealing with the “proper” format for this log. At times I feel somewhat constrained by the realization that your mother and her attorney could at some point find this and use it somehow against me, although of course at this point in time I have lost all custody and virtually all visitation. The visitation that I have is worthy of a criminal: I am to have only supervised visits, either in San Diego or in Boston, and for a few hours at a time. That time of visitation is only reserved for child abusers or pedophiles, neither of which I am to be sure, nor have I even been remotely accused of either. It is quite simply what your mother and her attorney with the collaboration of a woman mediator from Family Court services and our illustrious Family Court system, neither of which appreciate the role of a father in children’s lives and both of whom operated to protect the Family Court system from the scandal that will eventually ensue (follow). Their reasoning is to avoid you two becoming aware of my complaint against your mother for parental alienation by showing you videos of your behavior during webcam sessions. The entire idea is preposterous: how could there be anything wrong in showing you videos of yourselves on webcam when you yourselves are the ones in the videos? Of course, that is not the point, the point is that they are trying to protect the system itself. You see, I had been trying to get the videos into the Family Court system but I was barred from it. The Family Court judge would not allow me to present the videos as evidence against your mother in terms of her poisoning you against me. But I could not take the matter to the Court of Appeals or the Supreme Court without getting the issue before the Family Court first. The only way to get it into Family Court is get your mother to do it by having her react, which she did – she has always been very predictable. The Family Court however, predictably, rather than even watching the videos themselves and seeing if there was anything wrong in what your mother was doing, decided to remove custody from me altogether accusing me of doing something wrong with the videos – which they did not even watch! All is very stupid, but requires more energy on my part; typical. I am resting up for that ‘front’ as I await news from the first Appeal, which will go the Supreme Court unless I get what I believe to be just.

There is a story from the Spanish Civil War regarding a General from the Republic whose son was captured by the Fascists. The General had a position to maintain and defend. The opposing side had captured his son and called him on the landline to inform him that unless he gave up his position his son would be executed. The General listened attentively to the other side’s demands, and then finally asked to speak with his son. Once his son was on the phone he explained to his son the situation, told him that he loved him, and then said: “Son, entrust your soul to God.” The General then hung up the phone.

The point is that sometimes you have to operate from principle, from what is right, not from what is convenient; I am not a criminal, I have been a dutiful father and my record while any and all of my children have been in my charge has been impeccable; which is much more than I can say for your mother. The concept of fatherhood itself is degraded by this imposition that is placed upon me which simply further underlines my accusation of alienation on the part of your mother. And ‘principle’ is more important than the individual conveniences of anyone. Martin Luther King Jr. once stated that “a man who has not found a cause to die for is not worthy of living.” Regardless of how painful it is for me not to see you I will not see you under these shameful and despicable conditions: it shall not come to pass. One day, sooner or later, you will either come to find me or you will find these words and in your own minds, if you care, you will come to know the man I am and the father I was not allowed to be to you. If not, then to be honest you are not worthy to be my children and are deserving of your mother. I would still carry out the battles I have pursued because I am right in principle, and that is what we must all stand for to make this world a better place. “Evil prevails when good men do nothing.” Know then that your father was a good man, and stood as he could against this evil.

Love you both,

Shiken haramitsu daikomyo!